The reason I’m fat is simple, like many people, I’m fat because I eat to much and don’t exercise enough. I’m not here to make excuses, I’m not here to say it’s wrong or right to be the size that I am. I’m here to say that whatever size I am, whatever size you are, it’s okay to be body positive. It’s ok to look in the mirror and be happy with what you see. It’s ok to be fat and into fashion and make up, even if in our modern world it’s seen as a contradiction.
I’ve always been fat. I went from a chubby baby to a child coated in “puppy fat” to a teenager desperate to loose weight to an adult that is, well, just fat.
I don’t know why I was a chubby child, I’m not going to point blame.
I remember being told once that growing up as a fat kid was the worst thing that a person could experience growing up. That it was the hardest thing to be. I’m some respect I agree, it was difficult, it didn’t make the play ground the easiest place. But I can think of worse things, I would rather be fat than dishonest, I’d rather be fat than unkind and I’d rather have been fat than a bully.
I have always been a dieter. By the time I was 6 I was under a dietician, by the time I was 11 I was on slim fast. Going to secondary school everyday with a slim fast milkshake instead of a packed lunch, by the time I was 14 I was crash dieting and lost a lot of weight and by the time I was 15, I had begun a lengthy battle with bulimia.
I was told in treatment to stop dieting, that it was better to be fat than to be obsessed with weight loss and have an unhealthy mind. I didn’t believe them in any way, I wanted to be thin. Eventually I made my peace with not been able to diet. Then I was put on medication that made my weight shoot up to the highest it had ever been so I made a decision to start dieting again.
I lost some weight and then became obsessed again, so for now, I have to know, it’s ok to be fat, whether I’m this way for ever or just for a couple of years. My main aim in life should never be to loose weight, there are so many more important things to focus on.
I can be fat and like clothes.
I can be fat and still look good.
I can be fat and be proud of who I am.
Fat isn’t an insult, it’s a descriptive word. A word with connotations it should never have gained. So I’m taking that word back. I am fat and fat is not a negative word.